Thursday, February 16, 2012
PROJECT TWO: THE DISCO SCARF
Monday, February 6, 2012
Finishing Things
When I was living in South Africa, January and February were always filled with this rush of new energy. You're still in the yummy afterglow of the holiday season. The weather, though occasionally more enthusiastically sticky than you would like, is super fine. I always felt pumped with the prospect of new projects, or at least, long days to soak in.
However, here in the uninsulated depths of Sendai winter, it's the time of hibernation and hibernation breeds getting into ruts. It seems almost impossible not to fall into a routine of battle against the cold to get out of bed - go through the motions at work - make plans to do something affirming after work, which you ignore five minutes of stepping out into the steadily approaching twilight - go home and hide under your kotatsu and watch ridiculous amounts of TV thanks to your super fast Internet - pass out to the thought that "Tomorrow, I WILL do something other than watch six straight hours of Top Chef". Wash, rinse and repeat. Then, there you are a month later with a very intimate knowledge of the TV schedule and a sinking feeling that your life is being sucked out through your eyeballs. And it feels like there is nothing you can do to stop it.
This hibernation sickness, combined with an idea that's been brooding since I read Scarlett Thomas's "Our Tragic Universe", has led to a new project that embraces the desire to be somewhere warm and comfy, whilst also trying to prevent a spiral into soul crushing self-loathing. I've also recently listened to Caroline Myss's lectures on self-esteem (which I give a High Recommended Awesomeness Two Thumbs Up) and she has this whole deal about earning your own respect by getting things done. So, boom! Finishing Things it is.
What I think this might be about:
1. Minimizing
Several spiritual practices that I've come across in the past few years advocate a process of learning to do with less. Whilst some may take this to extremes like never using their heaters, I believe this is rather a process of discovering what is really important TO YOU, to find the things that give you joy and focusing your energy on those, rather than simply allowing your space - physical and mental - to be littered with stuff that you haven't consciously chosen.
2. Gratitude (Yeah, I know, I've written before how the overuse of this word makes it stick in my throat with gooey self-helpness, but it does have it's place)
Sometimes (if you're unlucky, often) you have bought or are give stuff that you don't really care for or forget about, but it may seem wasteful to simply throw away and so you let it collect dust through several spring cleanings. I guess the Gratitude idea comes from seeing what these things might be able to teach you. Sometimes that's a "Ooh! I never thought I would like that, but I do!" Awesome! Aaand, sometimes it's a reminder that, yes, it's still not for you. Lesson learned, or re-learned! Also, Awesome!
3.Being lost
Sometimes you get a little lost. You're not necessarily in a deep dark depression, but there is a vague dissatisfaction that follows you around. You've forgotten what inspires, excites and interests you. This is a way to explore your world as a stranger might and see what still fits. Something in you drew these things to you and said, "Yes".
Ultimately, I have a habit of starting things and not finishing them and these little things - like not finishing a well-intentioned knitting project - niggle at me and it's been pissing me off. So, in the next few months, it's about looking around, picking something that's been hanging around for a while and finishing it, and, hopefully, getting out of the rut.
And, yeah, I did consider starting another blog for this, but I have enough trouble trying to write with any kind of frequency on this one. Also, there are enough travel/ living abroad blogs in existence that make it seem like you spend every day hiking to mystical shrines and then party the night away in a hostess bar, doing sake shots with Godzilla and Hello Kitty. Yes, even after living abroad for a few years, things are still weird, but - just like everywhere else- after a while, things can get same old same old. Just like everywhere else, you have to remind yourself that this whole Life thing is supposed to be fun, right?
So, in the spirit of beginning things
PROJECT ONE: THE SCARF THAT TOOK A YEAR TO KNIT
I am not a particularly slow knitter, but this was a stop-start project that began when I was ill last year and I forgot about. Then summer came and what's the point? Knitting to me is a cosy winter past-time and doesn't belong in the sweaty months. I like knitting because it's something, especially when doing a straight forward project like a scarf (which, quite frankly, is probably all I'm actually capable of), can be done whilst watching TV, but you can see that you have achieved something other than eat the entire contents of your fridge. This project was a double whammy because all of the wool used was hand-me-downs from friends that left a year or two go. It finally got done during a bout of bronchitis over Christmas. It is snuggly and impractically long and vaguely reminiscent of Dr Seuss and that's why we like each other.
However, here in the uninsulated depths of Sendai winter, it's the time of hibernation and hibernation breeds getting into ruts. It seems almost impossible not to fall into a routine of battle against the cold to get out of bed - go through the motions at work - make plans to do something affirming after work, which you ignore five minutes of stepping out into the steadily approaching twilight - go home and hide under your kotatsu and watch ridiculous amounts of TV thanks to your super fast Internet - pass out to the thought that "Tomorrow, I WILL do something other than watch six straight hours of Top Chef". Wash, rinse and repeat. Then, there you are a month later with a very intimate knowledge of the TV schedule and a sinking feeling that your life is being sucked out through your eyeballs. And it feels like there is nothing you can do to stop it.
This hibernation sickness, combined with an idea that's been brooding since I read Scarlett Thomas's "Our Tragic Universe", has led to a new project that embraces the desire to be somewhere warm and comfy, whilst also trying to prevent a spiral into soul crushing self-loathing. I've also recently listened to Caroline Myss's lectures on self-esteem (which I give a High Recommended Awesomeness Two Thumbs Up) and she has this whole deal about earning your own respect by getting things done. So, boom! Finishing Things it is.
What I think this might be about:
1. Minimizing
Several spiritual practices that I've come across in the past few years advocate a process of learning to do with less. Whilst some may take this to extremes like never using their heaters, I believe this is rather a process of discovering what is really important TO YOU, to find the things that give you joy and focusing your energy on those, rather than simply allowing your space - physical and mental - to be littered with stuff that you haven't consciously chosen.
2. Gratitude (Yeah, I know, I've written before how the overuse of this word makes it stick in my throat with gooey self-helpness, but it does have it's place)
Sometimes (if you're unlucky, often) you have bought or are give stuff that you don't really care for or forget about, but it may seem wasteful to simply throw away and so you let it collect dust through several spring cleanings. I guess the Gratitude idea comes from seeing what these things might be able to teach you. Sometimes that's a "Ooh! I never thought I would like that, but I do!" Awesome! Aaand, sometimes it's a reminder that, yes, it's still not for you. Lesson learned, or re-learned! Also, Awesome!
3.Being lost
Sometimes you get a little lost. You're not necessarily in a deep dark depression, but there is a vague dissatisfaction that follows you around. You've forgotten what inspires, excites and interests you. This is a way to explore your world as a stranger might and see what still fits. Something in you drew these things to you and said, "Yes".
Ultimately, I have a habit of starting things and not finishing them and these little things - like not finishing a well-intentioned knitting project - niggle at me and it's been pissing me off. So, in the next few months, it's about looking around, picking something that's been hanging around for a while and finishing it, and, hopefully, getting out of the rut.
And, yeah, I did consider starting another blog for this, but I have enough trouble trying to write with any kind of frequency on this one. Also, there are enough travel/ living abroad blogs in existence that make it seem like you spend every day hiking to mystical shrines and then party the night away in a hostess bar, doing sake shots with Godzilla and Hello Kitty. Yes, even after living abroad for a few years, things are still weird, but - just like everywhere else- after a while, things can get same old same old. Just like everywhere else, you have to remind yourself that this whole Life thing is supposed to be fun, right?
So, in the spirit of beginning things
I am not a particularly slow knitter, but this was a stop-start project that began when I was ill last year and I forgot about. Then summer came and what's the point? Knitting to me is a cosy winter past-time and doesn't belong in the sweaty months. I like knitting because it's something, especially when doing a straight forward project like a scarf (which, quite frankly, is probably all I'm actually capable of), can be done whilst watching TV, but you can see that you have achieved something other than eat the entire contents of your fridge. This project was a double whammy because all of the wool used was hand-me-downs from friends that left a year or two go. It finally got done during a bout of bronchitis over Christmas. It is snuggly and impractically long and vaguely reminiscent of Dr Seuss and that's why we like each other.
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